Caroline Flack left a heartfelt message for her boyfriend Lewis Burton in her suicide note.
The 40-year-old TV presenter took her own life at her London home in February after being informed that the Crown Prosecution Service was going to pursue a trial on a charge of assault by beating following an alleged fight with Lewis at her flat in December 2019
Caroline had pled not guilty to the charges, while Lewis, 28, was not cooperating with the prosecution and an inquest into Caroline’s death at Poplar Coroners’ Court on Wednesday (05.08.20) revealed she mentioned the former professional tennis player in a note she left.
A paramedic told the court that there was a note on the coffee table, which read: "I hope me and Lewis can one day find harmony."
The court also heard how Caroline had been in "a very anxious state of mind" and attempted suicide before her court appearance in December 2019.
Caroline’s twin sister Jody said: "Heartbreak is something Caroline found extremely difficult. She attempted to take her own life the night before she appeared in court. I believe the shame … was too much to deal with.
"Caroline spent the last few months of her life hiding inside, scared of the abuse. Caroline seemed very sad the day before her death – she seemed to have lost her fight."
Caroline’s friends Lou Teasdale and Mollie Grosberg also revealed they raced to her flat on Valentine’s Day (14.02.20) after the star sent a message saying she was going to kill herself.
Mollie said: "Increasingly over the last few years she had a lot of heartache. She was very sad all the time.
"Normally the kind of person she was, she could pick herself up. But she couldn’t after December … she lost who she was and she couldn’t get it back."
The duo found Caroline barely conscious on the sofa, surrounded by tablets, and called an ambulance but Caroline denied to paramedics that she had attempted to kill herself.
Mollie said: "We were obviously very scared about getting the police involved. She was trying to explain. It was agreed she wasn’t going (to hospital) and I got very angry and shouted, I said this was ridiculous.
"They (paramedics) said: ‘She doesn’t want to go … you are going to have to do some babysitting’."
Paramedic Tony Rumore said: "At that time she could stand up, she was alert, she was slightly lethargic. She wasn’t slurring her words and was able to get her words out.
"We asked them to disclose what she had taken, they said she had taken tablets. She said there was no alcohol that night and denied taking anything else.
"We asked Caroline if her intention was to harm or kill herself, she said it was merely an attempt to sleep and escape from the stresses she was under.
"Our recommendation was always to be going to hospital but Caroline chose that she did not want to go."
Lou revealed they left Caroline’s home at 10:30am on the morning she died as she was upset with them for calling an ambulance.
She explained: "Caroline spoke to her family about coming the next day because she wanted us to leave, she was quite angry with us. She didn’t want us there.
"We were always nervous to call the police because she didn’t trust the police, and she didn’t want anything to come out to the public which looked like she was having a breakdown."
Burton said in a written statement: "The last time I saw Caroline she was very upset, in fact devastated, she was not in a good place emotionally.
"Sometimes she talked about taking her own life when she was extremely upset.
"What was worrying her most was the police case and losing her presenting job on Love Island, plus not being able to see me."
Caroline died by hanging and her body was discovered by Lou’s father Stephen Teasdale, who went to the scene after Jody rang to say she could not get in.
He said: "We came to the flat and tried to force entry. We thought about phoning the police but knew the landlady … We got the key and let ourselves into the flat."
Mr Teasdale explained that he discovered the body and he and Jody attempted CPR for "between five and 10 minutes" before the police arrived and took over.
To contact the Samaritans, call 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/