Phillip Schofield contemplated taking his own life whilst keeping his sexuality a secret.
The 57-year-old television presenter came out as gay earlier this week, and has now said he was taken to "the darkest of places" whilst keeping his sexuality hidden from the world, as he hints he may have tried to end his own life if he didn’t have the support of his wife Stephanie Lowe and their two daughters.
He said: "There is no doubt living with this kind of secret can take people to the darkest of places. And there is no question for me it got very dark, because it felt hopeless. There is no question, in those moments, when I couldn’t see a way forward, it was Steph and my girls – through their strength – who hauled me back.
"But I understand completely why so many men and women in this country get to the point of suicide. I had Steph and I had my girls and I don’t think I could have left them like that. But if I hadn’t have had their support, then who knows?"
The ‘This Morning’ star became "depressed" after hiding his sexuality for so long, and said his decision to come out came as the secret was starting to "damage" him.
He added: "I had to tell the truth because, if I am honest, it was affecting my head. It was starting to damage me and it was hurting me a lot.
"The whole family started to notice the change in me. I became very, very quiet, very down and locked into myself.
"I was depressed, but thankfully surrounded by a loving family.
"But there is no question the stress was taking a toll on my mental health. That is why I had no choice but to tell the truth – to take control back."
Phillip even sought professional counselling to help with his inner turmoil.
Speaking to The Sun on Sunday newspaper, he explained: "I sat down and poured my heart out for an hour and then I found myself outside on the street with very red eyes, having sobbed quite a lot, trying to figure out my way forward."
The ‘Dancing on Ice’ host announced his sexuality in a candid Instagram post, which was followed by his appearance on ‘This Morning’ on Friday (07.02.20) alongside his co-host Holly Willoughby.
Holly said she has "never been more proud of my friend than I have today", and read out Phil’s statement, before he reflected on how he is feeling.
He said: "It’s funny, because everyone I’ve spoken to, you, have all been so supportive, loving and caring, and my entire family, to a person, have grabbed us and said, ‘It’s OK, it’s OK. We love you, we’re proud of you.’
"Every person I tell it gets a little lighter and a little lighter.
"I’m really very aware that Steph and the girls are at home watching this, and we’re all together.
"We spent a lot of time together and they’ve been supporting us as we got to this moment.
"I feel a little lighter but I’m very aware there is no question it causes pain and upset.
"We’ve never had any secrets."
Phillip Schofield contemplated suicide amid sexuality battle
