Nikki Bella has been suffering from postpartum depression.
The 36-year-old retired professional wrestler gave birth to her son Matteo – whom she has with her fiancé Artem Chigvintsev – on July 31, and just two weeks later, Artem had to relocate from their home in Phoenix, Arizona, to Los Angeles to film the new series of ‘Dancing with the Stars’.
And now, Nikki has revealed packing her things to move to LA to join Artem, coupled with looking after their child by herself, has taken its toll on her mental health.
She explained: "This past week, Brie and I, we were in Phoenix packing up our homes, filming ‘Total Bellas’. I had Matteo on my own; still had a whole house to pack up – I did have help on that, but you still have to do so much – filming on top of it, and I had a massive breakdown."
Nikki admitted Artem’s absence isn’t the only thing getting her down, as she has also begun to regret her decision to hire help for Matteo.
She added: "It’s hard when you know your baby loves what you provide for him, like how feeding time is, how the song you sing when you swaddle him up or how you rock him and those things. So sometimes it’s hard not to get mom guilt or feel like I’m just a failure as a mom when I’m not giving him those things and I’m letting someone else do it and he’s fussy and he’s crying and he’s upset."
The beauty didn’t tell Artem about her struggles at first, because she wanted to be "supportive" of his career, but eventually sat down with him to talk things out.
She said: "I am such a pleaser and I try to be a perfect girlfriend or a perfect fiancée so I act extra supportive even if something’s bothering me deep down inside.
"I felt bad for Artem because it made him feel terrible and then he’s like, ‘I wish you came to me sooner.’ He was just so sad at the fact that I was feeling all these things and I never told him."
After talking things through, Nikki began to feel better, and now understands that "communication is key".
Speaking on an episode of ‘The Bellas Podcast’, she said: "Communication is key. Talking to people is key. If you are someone who’s fighting postpartum [depression] and you’re just trying to be strong like I was, you can’t. We can’t win this battle. We cannot fight postpartum depression; we just physically and mentally can’t and we have to talk to people."