Sunday, May 10, 2026

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David Walliams jokes about sex with Simon Cowell

David Walliams joked that he got his ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ job by sleeping with Simon Cowell.
The 45-year-old comedian quipped that Simon, 57 – who has son Eric with partner Lauren Silverman – only hired him for the ITV show after they had sex.
When a fan messaged him on Twitter to ask: "Hi, I know you won’t answer this but how did you become a judge on BGT?", David jokingly replied: "I slept with Simon Cowell."
However, the fan fired back with their own quip, writing: "I’m pretty sure Simon wouldn’t of let you (sic)."
David – who has son Alfred with ex-wife Lara Stone – has a good working relationship with Simon, who recently quipped that working with David is like being around an overly excited pooch.
He said: "David’s a giant. It’s like having a mountain behind you. A couple of times he has actually fallen on me. I’m thinking: ‘I’m going to break my neck here one day.’ But I can’t say anything because if I say: ‘Don’t do it,’ it gets worse. So I have to keep my mouth shut.
"Someone asked me the other day how I’d sum David up. You know when you had an auntie who had a big dog and, if you went there for tea, it would hump your leg? The first couple of times it’s like, ‘Can you get off my leg, please?’ After the third time you don’t even notice it. That’s sort of how I view my relationship with David. He is verging on the insane. I do believe that."
But their fellow judge Alesha Dixon admitted she sometimes feels sorry for Simon because he is constantly being "manhandled" by David.
She said: "I am actually starting to feel a little bit sorry for Simon. He literally spends most of the day trying not to be manhandled by David. David’s attempting to drag him out of his chair to dance and Simon doesn’t want to. One day that chair is going to go flying.
"David just won’t stop. He’s like a dog with a bone. Simon has found a way to have a sense of humour about it and, at the same time, it’s very funny to watch."

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