Richard Blackwood attempted to commit suicide after he was declared bankrupt 12 years ago.
The ‘EastEnders’ star – who will make his debut in the soap’s first 30th anniversary live show tonight (17.02.15) – has admitted he once stood on a window ledge ready to throw himself off but, fortunately, his girlfriend at the time, former fitness coach Samia Stokes, stopped him.
The former TV presenter told the Daily Mirror newspaper: "When I was made bankrupt, it was hard because I was one of the first young guys from the MTV era to be deemed to have it all and then to lose it all.
"I don’t drink or smoke. I never have. I’ve never taken a drug in my life. But I was depressed, I was even suicidal.
"It was very real for me back then. Every time I walked out of the house, I was reminded by people that I had failed.
"I actually tried to throw myself out of a window, and that’s very true. An ex-¬girlfriend at the time stopped me from doing it. But it was a very dark time."
While he credits Samia with saving his life, the 42-year-old actor insists ‘EastEnders’ executive producer Dominic Treadwell-Collins has changed his life for the better after casting him in the BBC One soap, and Richard admits he burst into tears when he was told he’d landed a role on the programme.
He added: "Before Dominic came to me, I had resigned myself to the fact that maybe this country wasn’t going to give me a role like this.
"When the audition came for ‘EastEnders’, I didn’t think I would get it.
"I felt disheartened and was planning to go to America.
"After the audition Dom said, ‘I want to offer you the role if you will take it.’ And I said, ‘If I will take it?’
"When I got the role I went back to my car and I started to cry. I couldn’t believe it. Dominic has changed my life."
Richard is "very nervous" about making his ‘EastEnders’ bow on tonight’s episode because even more viewers than usual will going to be watching the show this week as Lucy Beale’s killer is finally revealed.
He said: "I am very nervous. It’s not the live stuff that’s making me nervous, it’s joining the big machine.
"All eyes are on ‘EastEnders’ and I’m going to be in the midst of that as the new character."
EastEnders’ Live Week begins tonight at 7.30pm on BBC One.
Richard Blackwood recalls suicide bid
