Katie Waissel feared she would die when she contracted coronavirus.
The 34-year-old singer and her son Hudson, 23 months, were both hospitalised in March with suspected Covid-19 and the former ‘X Factor’ star admitted it was a very "frightening experience" for them both.
She recalled to Closer magazine: "It was such a frightening experience. Hudson was really ill – his breathing had shallowed and his temperature was 40 degrees, so I called an ambulance.
"At the same time, I was feeling really unwell – I had a continuous cough and couldn’t catch my breath. When it’s just Hudson and me, it makes you think, ‘What if I die? What’s going to happen to Hudson?’ It was overwhelming and scary."
Tests weren’t readily available at the time and the pair were sent home to isolate and Katie couldn’t help but reflect on her own mortality when Hudson was asleep.
She said: "I had to stay strong during the day, but I was a mess when Hudson was in bed at night.
"I felt scared and vulnerable being on my own, and we were ill for about a month.
"I was bawling my eyes out writing [a will] – my heart was in pieces. I wanted to make sure Hudson was in the best hands if anything were to happen to me. My biggest fear is not being here for him."
Katie felt frustrated having to cope with lockdown as a single parent, particularly seeing Hudson’s dad, Andy Speer, enjoying himself on his social media posts.
However, she praised him for offering support, albeit at a distance because he lives in the US.
She said: "There have been times where I’ve wanted to throw my phone out of the window, especially on the days I was finding it hard.
"I watched him doing Instagram workouts with his partner, while I was in and out of hospitals with our son, afraid I was going to die. It took a few conversations between him and me, but we have a good relationship now and he has been here emotionally for us.
"When I was in hospital with Hudson, I rang Andy and said, ‘I’m scared, I need you to stay on the line so I don’t feel alone’. Both Andy and I have worked really hard to get to this point."