Friday, April 19, 2024

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Fergie hints at her demons

Fergie got to a point where she was "seeing devils everywhere".
The ‘Big Girls Don’t Cry’ hitmaker appeared to open up about her own battle with her inner demons in a visual for her new track ‘A Little Work’.
She shared: "I got to a point where I was seeing devils everywhere. Devil faces. Creatures that would appear to me would say, ‘Fly, fly, fly.’ I would constantly be in this state of listening to the messages that all of these creatures … what they were going to tell me.
"What their messages were and what I should do and life became almost like this whole game. I was just going to lose it. I was about to start screaming at everybody in the street. I ended up on Wilshire and I saw this church."
The 42-year-old singer remembers writing journals about how she was feeling as she found it difficult to "trust" people.
She added: "I have journals of it all and I remember writing to myself throughout that period of my life. It’s how I can divulge my true feelings because it’s been difficult to trust, for me, in my life, so the paper is always where I could emotionally get to those crevices – those little corners of feelings. I’m so glad I did it because at least I was checking in with myself, at least I knew that I was becoming a f**k up.
"I had to really work hard at telling the spirit, the vision, to go away. I had to say out loud, ‘Leave me alone, I choose the good.’ It was this epiphany I had in the holy war of good against evil."
And Fergie – who has four-year-old son Axl with her estranged husband Josh Duhamel – remembers the amazing feeling when everything "lifted" off her shoulders all of a sudden.
She said: "That walk out of there [the church] – all of that demon that was there, it all of a sudden just lifted. It was almost like walking into the light. I realised that I finally needed to honour myself and that is really still a challenging place that I often have to work on to this day."

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